What my exes taught me
Every relationship we have should teach us something about ourselves or teach us something in general. Whether it’s a relationship between you and a teacher, or you and a friend, or you and a lover. I’ve started dating before my parents even allowed me to. Although they didn’t like it, I think they knew that it was essential for me to start learning about relationships, about myself, and about others sooner rather than later.
I was young and naive when I started dating this particular ex. I loved him more than I should have. He was a liar and a cheater and everyone knew it. I knew it. Looking back, I feel so stupid for letting it go on that long and it’s one of the few things that I regret. I think the one big thing I learned from this relationship was that I’m worth it. I stayed with him because I thought I wouldn’t be able to find someone else that will love me. I thought that his dishonesty was a small price for his love. I finally realized that this was not love and that I was worth it to myself to find someone who loved me infinitely and was loyal to me. After we broke up, I realized that I should have respected myself more than to stay with someone who didn’t respect me. He was kind to my face but cruel when I wasn’t looking. Although he thought I didn’t know, I had friends everywhere telling me everything he was up to. I’d break up with him, he’d cry, I’d feel bad and we’d back together by the next day. It wasn’t until I met my next ex that I had to courage to truly break up with him.
This next relationship was mostly good until the end. He taught me that it’s ok to try new things. It was because of him that I started to eat and like sushi and try new restaurants. Now I have a loving relationship with food. We also traveled a bit and triggered my interest in exploring new cities. We spent a lot of time together and at first it was a good thing but I think it started to become too much time together. We both went to the same school with mostly the same classes. After, we’d spend the rest of the day together until I had to go home. Our days became routines and I guess our relationship became boring. Our break up was messy but it was the first break up I had that I didn’t jump right into another one. It was during this time that I truly learned to put myself first. I started working out, hanging out with friends, eating by myself and just doing everything by myself. What I learned from this break up was that in order to be in a happy relationship, I must first be happy with myself.
Unfortunately, I learned to not trust people as easily since both of them were dishonest. I guess having difficulties trusting people has pros and cons on its own and a topic for another day.
For now, I want to thank my loving boyfriend who supports me through everything I do and for continuing to treat me like a princess and for loving me.
xoxo Catherine
